After the Storm

We have weathered another storm, and a tornado it was, with thunder and lightning bolts,and the blackest clouds.  The storm seems to have passed though, I am hopeful.  I am also thinking good thoughts, and Bless my ACIM group for they helped keep it all in perspective . Maybe he was reminding me of my dad before he died, he is so grey like him.  My dad was actually eight years younger than my DH when he died at 55 from a heart attack. You never forget . But why must I analyze?   I was afraid, and felt so helpless.  My best friend was suffering and I could do nothing to help him, and when I tried, he rebuked me.sometimes very angrily.  Not the first test I have faced in our 30 plus years together, but one of the most difficult for sure.  I found myself staring at him when he was lying down, eyes closed,contorted face, and felt fear.

I was never angry although at times he thought so, it was just frustrating and very scary. I know It’s best though to remember that I have help, they have helped me before, I just lost sight of them for awhile. I embrace them now.   My physical pain has been stronger these past few days, why do I punish myself ? I am only human.  If my posts of late have been lacking , mea culpa.

Tomorrow is tomorrow..light shining, eyes bright ..good night..

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